Escorting Challenges

It’s days like today that make escorting hard!

Most people think to be an escort the number one thing you must be is HOT!!!! but that’s honestly just not true. I’ve met girls of all shapes and sizes and all different kinds of looks; from covered in tattoos to not even a single piercing, from a size 4 to a size 20, from blonde to pink hair. Honestly there is something for everyone, so being the cliche “hot” is honestly the last thing I would tell someone they need to be if they were thinking about being an escort.

No, the number one thing is being emotionally intelligent. I’m sure there are plenty of working girls who would disagree with this statement and I have no problem with this, but for me, what I have learnt is being emotionally intelligent is the number one must. Honestly, when I first started telling people I was escorting they usually asked straight away about all the weird sexual requests I had been asked or had done for work, but to be honest the weirdest requests you get are the ones that have nothing to do with sex.

I recently met a fellow escort who has been working in the industry for a few years, and she said a few weeks ago she had been booked for a whole night shift. 10 hours of simply sleeping next to her client, because he struggled to sleep well when he slept alone. In these situations, you are kind of hoping that said client is away from home, and he has a partner he sleeps with, so he only finds the need to hire a companion for the night when he is out of town. But the reality is that he doesn’t have anyone, and either he doesn’t have the time or the social capability to find someone who would willingly sleep next to him because they want to. These are the requests that are the weirdest and saddest part of my job, simply because it speaks volumes about Western society and what we are becoming… lonely.

So why was today so hard? Well I myself was having an emotionally draining day to start with. It was one of those days you wake up and you know something is up with a friend. You try to forget about why they are ignoring your texts and try to focus on the fact that you are going to have to be emotionally available for your regular client you are seeing in less than 3 hours, but nothing can get your mind of your friend and you worrying. So already, before I got to work today, I was emotionally drained and anxious about being able to live up to my usual bubbly chit chat, and caring nature.

My client calls up to the hotel room and they session starts as usual; answer the door in some nice lingerie, kiss on the cheek, lead to the bedroom and ask how they’ve been. As soon as the words had left my mouth I could see something was wrong. These clients I see, yes occasionally they are new, but more often than not they are regulars, and when you are seeing them every week for the better half of a year you get to know their body language, facial expressions, everything honestly. You build some sort of relationship with them. I’d like to say it’s purely professional but when you care about these clients it’s not just about a financial transaction any more.

Anyway, my client starts tearing up and tells me he’s long term friend passed away recently and he found out the day of the funeral so he didn’t even get to go to the funeral. Instantly my heart both, flutters in anxiety wondering how I’m going to get through this shift, and drops in sorrow for him. This client of mine he works 6 days a week and the only social life he has outside of work is with me. I am his support line outside of work. I’m the one that tells him to not see me every week and instead spend the 1 day he has off work, going to do things out in public so he can meet people and make friends. I’m the one who tells him he needs to take time off work because he is running himself into the ground. As a psychology student I feel like no amount of volunteer work at a counseling clinic could give me as much experience as my current job does.

My 2 hour booking with this client which according to society and the majority of people is supposed to be a dirty, disgusting act of f**king with a random stranger for money, was in fact a 2 hour booking of being emotionally sensitive and intelligent enough to be able to ask the right questions, prompt at the right times and be quiet when needed. It’s sad escorting gets such a bad rep when in reality, the fact that people are having to pay for a stranger to be their emotional support sheds light on the seriously sad parts of our current society. It is this part of the job that is so hard, being that emotional support for so many clients who purely don’t have anyone else to lean on. In saying that it’s obviously part of the job I’m very passionate about, after all I am studying to be that person people can give their problems to on a more legitimate and more accepted basis. I just wish people didn’t need escorts and psychologists to be their supports, it really makes you question whether Western societal beliefs and priorities are going to drive all of us into the ground.

A 2 hour shift at work today took the emotional energy of at least one day in a more socially accepted job, it was draining. It was hard to be there and be that support for someone I barely know when at the start of the day I didn’t even want to be a support for anyone I cared about, let alone other random people in the world.

So, whether you are wondering about the drama with my friend or not, I’m simply going to say sometimes family is infuriating, and sometimes I don’t even know why I bother with some parts of my family, but everything I could write about my family could span over several blogs. Maybe one day I’ll let you guys in on the past 15 years of my life and fill you in on all the drama with my family, but today’s not the day.